getting healed through a dream

i started not feeling good last friday night. it continued during the weekend but still, i was able to go out with my brother and his wife and cousins who were visiting the next day. on monday, i was glad that i was feeling a bit ok especially that i still have an exam scheduled in the afternoon. i thought i was all better but when i woke up wednesday morning it's all back. my whole body was in pain, terrible headache plus im starting to have colds. not to mention the "visitor" who just came.

i was trying to act as if everything was ok. i even cooked for my bro, cleaned the kitchen, threw the garbage and just practically did the chores around the apartment. but afternoon came and im hot and feverish. i can't stand for along coz i get all dizzy. but even if i was feeling all that, i managed to still cook food for myself and wash the dishes and fix my bed. around 8:30pm i can't take it anymore and i felt like crying already because i just want to rest and sleep but i feel so uncomfortable. i hadn't taken a bath not coz i believe in the sayings of the old about not taking a bath when you're sick coz it worsens your condition. but, i just don't have the energy anymore. and the water just feels so cold for me and going down to boil some water is the last thing on my mind. so i just went to bed and texted my sister about what im feeling. though she's far, i kinda got the comfort i needed.

i took my temperature and it was 39. i was getting scared by the minute because i was thinking what if i got dengue or typhoid? but i dismissed it right away by thinking about my Mom and how she takes care of me whenever im sick.

Thursday ---- i woke up today feeling like nothing happened. i feel way better like i was never sick! i then i remember my dream..

my MOM! she was on my dream! and i tried hard to recall everything....

we were sitting on my grandparents' car port while she's cleaning my fingers on my right hand. she kept on teasing me about my neck being so dirty because i still haven't taken a bath.an officemate of my Dad was there too. my Mom told her that she feels so sad that i always sleep due to lack of energy. i can't remember if i said anything to her.. all i know is that i can't take my eyes off of her. my late uncle moni was there, too. he's holding a digicam and kept on taking pics and he still has the boyish grin ha always have.

... maybe throughout the night, my mom was there taking care of me. making sure i'll be alright and that when i wake up im all fine. maybe she got my message that i miss her so much and that i long for the way she watches over me whenever im sick.

whatever the reason why im better now, im really thankful! the thing is, thinking about my Mom makes me strong, it gives me the willingness to fight. i've broken a lot of promises but one thing im definitely not gonna break is her belief that im gonna be ok when she leaves. that's what she told one of her cousin in-law before she passed away. that even if im still young, she believes that i can make it no matter what. and im not gonna let her down. i will and always be alright no matter how hard life's gonna be for me. im gonna make sure of that.

........... thanks MOM!!!
..............your youngest daughter misses you so bad!