"I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Phil 4:13

Thursday, November 27, 2008

WE need more of him..

watching the video almost made me cry. an 11 year old boy who has leukemia, certainly made an impact.

watch the video --> "Dying Boy's Wish Feeds the Homeless".

... im just thinking, if an 11 year old sick boy can do this, it's not impossible for us healthy citizens to do it, too. we need more of Brenden Foster!

RIP B-man!

Monday, November 24, 2008

goodluck!

this coming november 29-30, 2008 is gonna be a nerve-wracking day for a lot of people who wants to be able to have a RN title after their names. yep! Nursing Licensure Exam (NLE) it is... so, for my batch mates and friends of mine who are bout to take the board exam by the end of the month, LOTSA LUCK FOR YOU GUYS!!!

* karla amalia louise magno
* jason acosta
* ayesha guiani
* glady rose torrefranca
* kris andriane chiu
* julie manigque
* gino genabe
* janus viloria
* jefferson medina
* hamid gani
* samantha ann singh

For the others that i forgot to mention, im sorry.
anyway, godbless future nurses!!!


PS: CONGRATULATIONS to my friend, Sharleendel Dano for passing the Midwifery Licensure Exam a week ago. so, it's Sharleendel Dano, RN., RM. --> AMAZING!!!

Monday, October 27, 2008

..because I KNOW

.. that soon, i'll be fine.

.. that soon, i can make them proud.

.. that this sh!t im in will soon be over.

.. the MAN ABOVE will never abandon me.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Travis Barker survives


Blink 182's drummer, Travis Barker survives a plane crash last September 19 with his friend, DJ AM [Adam Goldstein] in Columbia, South Carolina that killed four others. the two of them are the only survivors of the late-night Learjet crash [video]. It happened when they were about to leave the city after performing a free concert for a thousand college students.

"I hate plane. My biggest fear ever is to be involved in a plane crash, so when that happened... well, I'm just thankful to be alive! I'm just grateful to be here at all. ... I'm so anxious to get out of here. I've just been in surgery after surgery. I have third-degree burns basically from my feet up to my waist and both hands. One of my hands has second-degree burns and one has third-degree burns. ...I'm trying to have a quick recovery and play the drums again and be able to hold my two kids again," says Barker during his 1st interview after the accident.


He's hoping to leave the hospital in a few weeks time and be all good though the process will take some time.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

if i never see your face again...

You say I’m not your type, But I can make you sway.

Now you’ve gone somewhere else, Far away
I don’t know if I will find you.

If I never see your face again, I don’t mind

Sometimes you move so well
It’s hard not to give in.

I’m lost, I can’t tell
Where you end and I begin.

I wonder if she’s half
The lover that I am.

Take me down, but take it easy
Make me think but don’t deceive me...

friends for keeps!

people come and go.
there's a lot of them in my life that i don't even know where there are now. and i don't really care.

BUT,
.. lately, i've been out with friends almost every night. the ones i know, i'll really look for if any of them goes MIA. i kinda forgot how it is being with them and doing crazy stuff just because i was so busy with my 'other' life. i focused on just one person and now i see how wrong was that.

.. im happy! whenever im with them, there's no dull moment. one text, and they're on their way to help you out. i love being with them and no, i won't exchange them for anyone else.

some of them i just got to know recently but it feels like ages! i can tell them almost everything without hesitations. they LISTEN. they don't judge. they tell you frankly if you're being stupid. and what i LOVE most about them is the fact that, they're THERE. even if you try to contact them during an ungodly hour, you know for sure that you've got someone you can call and talk to.

*** i don't know if any of you can read this. but nevertheless,


THANK YOU!

[amards sah?] but it's all for real! :)



Tuesday, October 14, 2008

being swept away

i've always wanted to see my brother happy with a girl he truly loves. a girl who would love him the way he deserves it. honestly, whenever i see my brother cry [yes, he cries], because he had a fight with his gf, i cry too. if he gets hurt, i get hurt. all i know is that, i want him to be happy! he deserves to be happy!

last month, he got married to one of the nicest girls i know. and im glad that my bro got her.. im glad that finally, they are tied. she makes my brother excited for the next day, she makes my bro smile with no particular reason at all.. and seeing my bro that way is enough for me.

Friday, October 10, 2008

where are you?

it's NOT the EFFORT that makes me smile..

it's the WILLINGNESS of that person to go through the effort of doing crazy things


.......... just to see me SMILE *sigh*

Saturday, October 4, 2008

IT’S NOT THAT “EASY”

Coming from a broken family, seeing my sister broke down because of a guy and my brother getting all heartbroken because of a girl, my friends being cheated on by their partners got me all scared. I was still young when I got exposed to this kind of scene. And with that, I have this trust issues I just can’t seem to get off my system. I promised myself that if I get into a relationship, I’ll be a very good partner. I’ll do whatever it takes. Easy to say it but I wasn’t aware how hard it is. I thought, seeing all those things are enough for me to be a good partner. I was wrong.

I got into a relationship when I was 14 with a guy who is 2 years older than me. A guy my Dad doesn’t approve of. But still, I fought for him. At a young age, I did almost everything just to save what I have with this guy. Since it was my first, I wanted to believe that what we have is real. We only lasted for 4 months. After that I had like 5 other boyfriends and some flings. But I have to say, I’ve fallen in love only twice. The last time was early last year. And until now, I’m having a hard time trusting again. I tried and tried. Yet, still I failed. I guess I’m still not ready. I stay positive when it comes to relationships. I want to be positive.

But my being positive led me to a series of a not so good relationships and ready to bury experiences. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that being positive is not a good thing. It is. As long as you don’t get lost in your own dream world. Most of the people who don’t know much about what I’ve been through would view me as a play girl because I’m always seen with different guys. I can’t blame them. Since, I do always hang out with guys than my girl friends because I’m more comfortable with them. Anyway, I’m giving them the benefit of doubt.

If I’ll tell every single detail of the relationships I’ve been and how I got where I am now, I think I’ll be able to write a book already. Since that’s quite long, I’m just going to jump off right to the “now”. I met someone. Smile smile. Remember my last post? Yes, that’s him. Every time my phone beeps, I always hope that it’s him texting. Every time I open my Friendster account, I always hope that I have a message or a comment from him. I just can’t get him off my mind. I try my best not to think of him but I find it so hard! I don’t like this. Our situation is not easy since he is taken. I’m falling so hard to a guy who is already taken. Nice, huh? I’m no home wrecker and I curse those who are, for the reason that my very own family fell apart because of a third party. I don’t want to do that, I don’t want to be part of that kind of drama. Again, it’s easy to say. My mind and heart keeps on fighting. I know what is right. But my heart is screaming for him. My mind is all about him but my heart doesn’t want to create pain for another person. My heart is starting to beat for him but my mind says it isn’t right. I thought I knew what to do. I thought with what happened to my family and with the relationships I’ve been, I’d be able to pull myself and be a good partner. Well, I just thought. I JUST THOUGHT. There’s more to life than this. I know that. But tell me, how? How can I get rid of this?

How can you rid off a guy who can make you smile with just a Hi? How can you get rid of guy who can make you stand up early in the morning just because he wak
es up early? How can you get rid of a guy who makes you get out of your house in the middle of the night just because he’s bored and he wants to hang out? How can you get rid of a guy who made you slow down in drinking just because he said so? How can you get rid of guy that made you willing to do anything he asks for your own good? How can I get rid of a guy who makes me feel “this” way again? The very feeling I had early last year. How can I get rid of him without even trying if we could have something?



Without even trying
.. trying means trying to ruin his relationship with his girlfriend. Trying means me, being a home wrecker. Trying means me being inconsiderate. Trying means me being selfish.

IM STUCK!

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

... being MILEY

ok.. im not a Miley Cyrus fan but her song 7 things has been playing in my head over and over again since Sunday night. i don't know. the song doesn't really fit the situation im in now but the last line .. "And the 7th thing i hate the most that you do. you make me love you" --totally strucked me!

..see, i just met this guy and we were in a club with our own circle of friends. we were dancing when the dj played a hiphop version of "7 things" ..yea yea.. too early for the "you make me love u" line. but the thing is, everytime i hear the song, his face is all i can think of and the way he smiles...

and then last night, he asked me out.. and there goes the song again!

i've got a lot to say bout this guy but im keeping my mouth shut for the mean time..

there's just something bout this one that i can't even focus. and whenever im with him, things just fall into place.. arrgghhh!!!

anyway, while searching for the whole lyrics of 7 things, i stumbled upon Miley's other famous song, "See You Again". ..i think this fits more...


... i just can't wait to see him again!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

MANCHA COMPETENCIA



* 3 nights [oct. 8-10, 2008] of henna STAINS, ROCKoustic and FIREdancing!!!

*if you wanna join you can get your registration forms at MANDEX BAR, CAGAYAN de ORO CITY.

*or contact TWENG - 09193052579 or ACE - 09192373957

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Sanrio Hello Kitty Cell Phone 338 --FOR SALE!!!





*bought in Hong Kong, used only for a week, good as new! ;)
*you can also swap it for a low end phone plus cash.. ;)


SPECIFICATIONS:

-1.3 mp camera
Dual- Band -Dimensions: 37 x 94 x 16mm

-Weight: 70g

-Screen: 260,000 color 1.5 inch TFT Screen

-Ringtone: 64Poly / MP3 Ringtone

-WAP/GPRS/MMS/SMS Enable

-Computer Connection: Support Window XP, No driver is required

-Power: 3.7V 600mAh (3~5 hours Talking, 2~3 days stand-by Time)

-MP3 Player: Music plays by Stereo headphone / Built in Stereo Speakers
3GP / MP4 Movie Player

-Sound Recorder

-Games: 2 games included

-Phone Book: 200 contacts
Option: Name, Mobile/Home number, Fax, Email, Company Name, Email Address, Caller Pics/Ringtone, Contract Group

-Extra: Stopwatch, Calculator
will also include 512mb t-flash
extra battery

Thursday, August 21, 2008

It's NOT really goodbye


H
ave you ever experienced losing a loved one? But you never really made an effort of telling or letting that person feel how much he or she means to you? You just keep on thinking that they'll always be around. If not, then TRUST ME! The feeling completely SUX! You'll always going to carry the regret of ignoring that person wherever you go, whatever you do. And that is the very feeling i don't want to experience ever again. Yes, AGAIN!


See, my parents separated when i was 4 years old. Heard their arguments, witnessed their fightings, saw my Mom crying. I'm not really close to her but when Papa left, it was with her that I spent my early years with. I got used to her always being around, her rules, her cooking, voice, laugh and her stare. Then, when I was 13, she passed away.


I was young and naive and never really thought about death. I thought she'll always be around, always thought that she'll never leave me and my siblings like my Papa did. But, reality struck me when God took away my backbone.


L
osing her made a great impact in my life. Everything changed! My plans, how I trust and deal with other people, the way I look at life. From Mama's little-happy-go-lucky girl, I turned into an emotional, scared and untrustful lady who acts bitter most of the time.


T
hat experience taught me a lot! Not only about growing up but more on not wasting time, not ignoring the people around me and taking off hate out of my system. Life's too short to waste it all away. Cliche as it may sound but it's true, "You'll never know what you've got till it's gone."


I
used to ask God, "why me?" My Dad left us and now He took my Mama away. I was mad! But, later on, it dawned on me. God just wanted me to learn. Its just that he taught me a lesson the hard way.


G
iven a chance to spend even just a day with my Mom, I definitely would. I want to taste her cooking again, break her rules, hear her voice and laugh at her silly jokes. I would love to have someone I could watch foreign movies and share Danielle Steel novels with. I want to experience having someone I could run to, someone I could call in the middle of the night, someone who would just hug me tight and listen to my heartaches. Someone who would bring me to the mall and go shopping with or just have conversations over a cup of coffee.


B
ut, the thing I miss the most is when I say, "Ma, punta na ko school. Bye!" ..It just feels so different going to school these days with no one saying bye to. No one's answering me back and tells me to take care and to go home straight after class. I MISS HER SO MUCH! Now, i'm stuck on whispering "i miss you" and "i love you's" in the wind hoping it'll reach my Mom.


I
f you ask me how was I able to get through the years without my Mother? I'm not quite sure. But, I just think about this always -----



I NEVER REALLY LOST HER. I ACTUALLY GAINED AN ANGEL!

Sunday, August 17, 2008

VOTE RICKY STONE!

ever heard of DJ Ricky Stone?
no? yes? maybe?

well, a couple of days ago i received a friend request from him on myspace. and as a music lover, i listened to his tracks. a combination of progressive/techno/thrash music, you can't help but groove along to his beats.

if you want to check him out --->


also, he's going to be at Embassy, Manila on August 29. so, catch him there! and for the Cebuanos, lets just cross our fingers that he'll pay us a visit by January next year...

also, lets vote for him on this years dj magazine top 100.


Sunday, August 10, 2008

apparition in Simala, Cebu

i've been here in Cebu for over a year now. but i haven't visited the spots worth visiting except here in the city. though i've heard a lot of stories about the places here, and im pretty much excited to visit all of them whenever i have the time and money.

there's this one province here in Cebu where a lot of Virgin Mary devotees goes. it's like a grotto. they say Mary had an apparition there. i don't know. this place is in Simala, Sibunga.

i wanna share a video i saw last night. my friend said that it was taken a month ago. people aren't allowed to take pictures and video if you're inside but someone did. anyway, look closely, and you'll see something unusual.



did you see it? if not, focus on the statue of Virgin Mary and you'll see an apparition of Sto. Nino. i totally had goosebumps while watching it.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

dorky no more!

i was talking to my sister awhile ago and she shared to me some photos. i wasn't really paying any attention since i don't know who the person was. but i have to admit, he is cute! ..it was on the 3rd photo that i asked her who the guy was... she just told me to guess.. like, hello?! i don't have a freakin clue!

here's a picture, let's see if you can guess it right...


do you know who he is? no?

hmmm...


here's another picture...




you now know?

if you still don't know well, here.. a picture when he was still younger...




it's Michael Lewis, the guy who plays Neville Longbottom in the movie Harry Potter!

damn he's HOT!

Friday, August 1, 2008

alcohol warning labels

1. Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.
2. Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
3. Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.
4. Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to strangle you.
5. Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.
6. Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that your ex is really dying for you to call them at 4:00 in the morning.
7. Consumption of alcohol may cause serious rug burns on the forehead and chin area.
8. Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really big guy named Bubba.
9. Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
10. Consumption of alcohol may cause a flux in the time-space continuum, whereby gaps of time may seem to disappear.
11. Consumption of alcohol may result in pregnancy.
12. Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the heck happened to your pants.


hmmm... well, maybe.. JUST MAYBE.. i'll ditch alcohol?

NAH!

let's support TWENG!!!

this all started last week. im feeling all supportive not just to my friends but to those who asks for well.. my support.. hihihi...

i don't know. i've been a myspace addict since high school. and my friends just grew to millions! bands, artists, comedians, athletes, etc.. some just added me up, some really sends messages and a lil some really replies.

from the millions of friends i have in my account, there's only a few people i decided to meet. with few, i mean like 5-15 people only. seriously! it scares me a lot so i really make sure that the person im going to see is ok.

anyway, that's not my point. haha! back to being supportive. there's a list of people and bands that i wanna share to you but i'll post them later. right now, i have a friend [really know him personally,ok?] who is totally TALENTED! amazingly talented that i hate him already! hahaha! i just wanna post the links of his works, spread the word and yea, be really supportive coz aside from his talents, he's a great friend...

so here... from artifacts to arts and writing to making music... he does that..

mUGS
henna
fire shows
mUSIC


now isn't he some kickass!?!?

if you'd like to contact him, you know what to do...

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

bestie kens blog

its been a long time since i blabbed here. and uhmmm, there's a lot to say but im not doing that now. im just here to post the link of my bestfriends blog entry about me. weee!!!

bestie ken, soon!!!! u know what i mean..

labshoo!!!

chika tayo malapit na... ;)

so, people, here it is... just click the link ---> BESTIE KEN

Friday, June 27, 2008

celebrating ... and missing ...






1 year of friendship!!!
..sobrang happy ko that i met someone like you bestie. as in! like, i can tell u everything and u never judged me. i never felt na iniwan mo ko sa ere or nagalit ka sa akin. u were always supportive with my decisions and sobrang thank you po...

see u soon, ha? :)






...my cousin Cindy, left for Christchurch, NZ, yesterday.. this past few weeks we were always together since she has to do a lot of meetings and paperworks here in Cebu. im gonna miss her a lot! she's one of my closest cousins and i can tell her practically everything.. lalo na when it comes to family problems.. she acts like whatever and may appear like a happy-go-lucky kinda girl but talk to her and she'll knock some sense out of u.

..hopefully, she'll be able to come home next year. we were all together yesterday. her twin sister and younger sister, me and my brother had breakfast and went to the airport after. walang iyakan.. todo pigil.. that's what she requested.. walang iiyak. so we didn't. was teary eyed but then, she looks so happy i don't want to ruin it.





..it's my late Wa Mie's bday.. i don't know how old na sana sya now. hehe.. but anyway, u might be reading this from heaven or u might be watching me now while im doing this.. so uhmm.. HAPPY BIRTDHAY, La!!! i miss u.. and the things we do together.. i miss the foods u cook, the dresses u make.. but i know you're happy now. you're with Wo Poy :) ...

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

i don't know!

... simply complicated

---- THAT'S ME!


if you don't get me, well, your not the only one... ang dami na ninyo!
no matter how i try, wala e.. anung magagawa ko kung ganun na talaga ko? hirap na rin ako sa sobrang gulo ng utak ko.. that's why im trying to be alone for awhile. less complications if less people ang involved. if i appear like wala sa mood or walang paki, don't take it seriously.. this is just another phase of nessy's stupidity...


mga a few weeks from now, hopefully, im back to my other self. atay ui! na.unsa naman ko?


pasensya na lng..

Friday, June 20, 2008

HOME ....

last week i was watching THE WEDDING DATE. its an old film (2005) but i was bored so i watched it again. Debra Messing reminds me of our local celebrity, Marian Rivera.. the smile and the way they act is sobrang pareho! :)

anyway, i loved their soundtrack! especially the last featured song in the film.. Michael Buble's song, HOME.. i now have it in my friendster account as my profile song.. im not much of a fan of him but the song reminds me of a lot of things! ..made me realize where my heart really belongs..

listen to it and fall in love! ;)

Home - Michael Buble


HOME IS 6300!!!

Sunday, June 15, 2008

21!

oh and yea! ..i turned 21 last june 10.. yep! freakin 21! grrr... 4 more years and its quarter life crisis for me.. sandali.. medyo nafi-feel ko na nga now pa lang, e.. hahay..

i spent my bday with new friends.. night before my bday, i was out with 2 guy friends of mine who kinda took care of me when i was in Bohol. nah.. more like my tourist guides/bodyguards/clowns/drinking buddies.. was planning to go home after dinner but then i got stuck with them. they won't let me leave so fine.. i stayed with them and just went around the city til we decided to just go and have a couple of drinks...

'twas fun being with them! kinda forgot everything i was worrying about..

the next day, i was alone. turns out my brother went out of town and won't be back till later that night. so, again, i was with the 2 crazy boys.. well, just one of them since the other guy was with his gf. we just went around the mall... then i got a text message from my bro informing me bout a dinner..

anyway.. my bday is kinda blah.. twas quiet.. but nice! ..it's true how simple things and unexpected people could really make you smile...

--

for the people who greeted me.. texted and called.. tHANKS SO MUCH!!!!
for those that i didn't expected to greet me, sobrang WOW! i appreciate it.. the people from myspace.. haneps! na amaze ako sa inyo.. hahay...

well, here's to another year of uhmm.. craziness!

absent muna..

im back here in Cebu. been 2 weeks na rin.. just wasn't able to update my blog due to personal reasons. i haven't been on-line for days na rin. milagro nga, e! before, my fingers get itchy pag 1 day na d ako nkapag-net. but now, i can go on for days without checking my accounts..

i admit, i miss talking to my friends, reading blogs, updating my profiles and well.. talking to HIM! times im online, he's not.. when he's on, im not.. when he calls, im acting really stupid and when he's not calling, im missing him. kalokohan! umandar nanaman si ako... tsk2x!

anyway, i'll be gone for awhile. there's just some things that i need to fix. there's school, there's this job im trying to bag and well other personal stuff.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

BOHOL!


...and im here in my second home..



Tagbilaran City, Bohol!!!

i've been here since Monday, June 1. just spending more time with my cousins since one of them is leaving for New Zealand later this month. she's one of my closest cousins so im just grabbing the opportunity to hang out with her.

so excited to hang out with my former classmates, too but unfortunately most of them are in Cebu now, taking the Nursing Board Exam. still haven't seen them. but i did hanged-out with some friends i met last Xmas vacation.

was planning to hit the beach yesterday but i was too busy finishing the articles about a herbal supplement.. gotta work to earn..

anyway, i woke up so early this morning. i just felt like having a walk by the seaport. i miss the place and i just wanna watch the sunrise. it was a nice walk! i even saw 2 of my friends but they were in a hurry so it's just a hi and bye kinda thing. i love the moment i had in the seaport. 'twas nice and calming.. i just love the sea!!! im definitely going back there tomorrow morning.




Friday, May 30, 2008

LAKERS to the FINALS!!!

weee!!! and they're back! *rejoice! rejoice!* *dancing and jumping and just celebrating* my LAKERS won against SPURS and is going to advance to the finals with the CELTICS, i hope..

oohhh... i can't wait! this one is going to be totally awesome!!!

Thursday, May 29, 2008

drummer UN-luck

Just when i least expected it, BOOM! ..there he is infront of me.
I was walking with my twin cousins in the mall earlier when I saw a familiar face. My heart started to beat so fast and it feels like I couldn’t make another step. i know that face! ..the eyes, the smile, the goatee, the walk ..i know that! I KNOW HIM!


2 years ago, he was mine. 2 years ago was the greatest days of my life. 2 years ago we were the “in” couple. Girls would hit on him infront of me but he ignores them and would do sweet things to me to piss the girls off. Guys would do the same to me but my eyes were totally fixed on him. I was just totally into him. We were the “ignore them coz I have you” couple. Sadly, we have to part ways. His hugs and kisses, his company, our moments, I’ll never ever forget.


We all have our ideal guy. People would always say that such ideal guy doesn’t exist. I was able to prove them wrong. My ideal guy exists. And that was HIM...



*that jacket with lotsa memries... *
My lucky drummerboi.. the one who made me really happy each day, the one who made me believe that there is such thing as luck, the one who pushed me to do my best, the one who never failed to believe in me, the one who trusted me no matter what, the one who was always there for me..


That was 2 years ago and I thought I’ll be just fine if ever we’ll see each other. But if you could only see me earlier, i look so stupid! i just blurted out his name and he stopped and just stared at me. I just smiled and he did, too. I almost fainted. ..it took us a couple of seconds to say hi. I know he was surprised to see me coz what he said doesn’t make sense. He asked me where I was studying though he already knows it and he just kept on saying my name. and he just kept on smiling and didn’t let go of my hand.



I’ve waited for so long to see him again, and when I did, I made a complete fool of myself. I acted like I was in a rush and just stared at him the whole time. I don’t even think I said anything to him except for the name of my school and bye. I was dumbfounded. I just grabbed my cousin and walked to the opposite direction as fast as I could.


Past is past, I know. but if seeing him made me that way, how much more if I’ll see the guy who I was with a year ago? The guy I cried over, the guy who I’ve tried to forget that took me more than a year. I won’t say im over him coz I really don’t know. thinking bout it still brings tears to my eyes.

i should leave the past behind but HOW? Everytime, someone comes into my life, the past just pops in my head. The what-if’s just won’t leave my mind. So im left with a lot of issues. Trust, to be more specific.

I can’t wait for the time when im all ready to dive in all over again. Can’t wait for the time where I could just trust wholeheartedly and won’t worry and get scared and chicken out and leave a phrase instead of a sentence.
Anyway, guess I just have to take things really slow and try not to get really attached to someone…


PS: both of them are drummers. Lucky drummerboi is one of the best in their place and his band had performed as open acts for a lot of famous bands here in the Philippines. The other one, is my mentor in drums.

0528

I had fun walking under the rain tonight. :)I might get sick again but, I don’t care-- at least at that moment. Nothing really happened today except that i had an OC series marathon with Ate tathlyn, bestfriend ni ate Delite [ate ni deisa]. She got hooked na rin. Haha! Yesterday naman, Deisa went back to the immersion thing and this time I won’t see her for almost 2 weeks. Back to oh-so-quiet moments in the apartment again..

Good thing I’ll be doing something tomorrow. Enrolment na for the 1st term. Im actually excited! School’s gonna start na in a couple of weeks and I’ll be busy again! Im such a DORK! But I love being a dork.. :)

0527

a few days ago, I was out with my bro and his gf, ate Shishi. Spent the whole day with shishi and her family. Kuya left early since he still has work. So me, shishi and her mom went around the mall. Her lil sister, Dj and her dad was too tired to join us so we left them in Pizza Hut. It was so nice spending time with them. They’re so much fun! Makes me miss the whole family thing. I had lunch and dinner with them. Dinner was different coz kuya’s not there anymore. Kinda awkward but Teddy “pooh bear” arrived a lil later. He’s Jenny’s [cattleya] bf. Jenny’s shishi’s other younger sister.


i was sick the day before and I wasn’t really feeling well that day but I still decided to go with them coz I don’t want to get stuck at home alone again. I guess ‘twas a good decision. Spending time with the soon-to-be in-laws. :)



ShiShi and my bro, Skeets


--
The other day, was so glad to see Deisa, my fake cousin.




Fake coz she’s not really my cousin. Her sister is the ex gf of my real cousin. Haha! Anyway, we live in the same apartment and she’s been away for like a week. She had an immersion. Something she’s required to do for her nursing course. She woke me up and just talked and talked. I just listened to her since im still a bit groggy. And then next thing I know, I was in the bathroom taking a bath. I spent the whole day with her. Trying to catch up.. had brunch, went shopping with her, had our nails done and went home to get some rest. Then when we woke up a couple of hours later we decided to just go out again and shop some more. Actually, it was her who really shopped. I just bought this trench coat I found...was glad I accompanied her. Now I know a new, really cheap place to shop. :)

--
Still has no internet back in the apartment. So everynight I still have to go to the internet café I once hated. Yep! I hated it and the people running it. but I can’t do anything since it’s the nearest café from where I live.

Anyway, im loving them now. I try to be extra nice to them and really patient coz they tend to just stare at me whenever I asked or tell them something. I don’t know if they understand what im saying or they just wanna stare. WHATEVER! At least, they’re ok now.

i leave the place around 11 or 12 midnight. Sometimes past 12. my latest would be 1am. And everytime I go home, I just walk. Where I live is up in a hill. That’s why it’s called Buena Hills. But it’s not that far. I walk for just like 5 mins. And every night I do that, I LOVE IT! walking alone in the middle of the night can be really scary but there’s this peacefulness inside of me that overpowers that fear. Stars and the moon, LOVELY! walking alone in the middle of the street all by myself. Like literally alone. No other people, no cars.. and I always have this amazing feeling inside of me!

*this pic is old though*


If my dad get to know about this, Im pretty sure he’s gonna get mad. He never wanted to see or hear that im out at night, alone. Im his precious lil baby girl if I might add. But then, I love breaking his rules. Not that I want him to get mad. I just wanna do the opposite. :)

Anyway, I guess im better off alone. “no man is an island”. I know. I still look for my family and friends but I’ve never been happier compared to the times when im alone. I don’t know. weird, you might say. But, that’s me. Well, the people I wanna be with are just, let’s say, too far.
Im blabbing. I know. im drinking right now. just a bottle. Why am I craving for alcohol?! i can’t be like this. I need something to do. Well, good thing enrolment’s tomorrow. That means 1st term for this school year is near. Something to do and get busy with.


Let’s go back to drinking… they say people who drinks don’t get white hair right away. Haha! I don’t know if that’s true. Shishi’s mom just told me that. If that’s the case then I guess I’ll have a jet black hair for a very long time.haha!

Monday, May 26, 2008

temptation!

--May 24, 2008


I just received a text message from a friend. He was inviting me to go with him and his friends sa Kawasan Fall tomorrow. They’ll be leaving this afternoon at 5 and spend the night at Argao. TEMPTATION!


I’ve mentioned from my previous post how much I want to explore Cebu. This is my chance! I’ve heard a lot of stories bout Kawasan Falls, seen pictures, too. I think it’s beautiful! But, I declined. Yes, I turned his invitation down. I don’t want to but I need to. [I need to save myself! Lol!]


Everything’s ok except for the person who invited me + his friends. It’s not that they’re not nice. Actually they’re beyond nice! I met them through one of my friends who happened to meet them in Boracay Island. So, what’s it with them?


They’re just too uhmm.. I don’t know.. carefree, I guess. Like they don’t care what’s gonna happen next or if they’ll hurt someone. I onced hanged-out with them and I had so much fun but it later scared me. Scared me in a sense that I might get in trouble or meet an accident. They’re like 8-9 years older than me but we were able to jam alright. It’s just that, they’re too much. Im just too young, I guess to do the things they do. Though I can do what they’re doing. I miss their company actually. Like what I’ve said, they’re so much fun and they treat me all like a princess! But, i just don’t like the person I am whenever im with them.


Heaven in hell. Something like that… that’s why im kinda avoiding him. I don’t know if the guy noticed but I’ve turned his invitation a lot of times. He invited me to party, have lunch and dinner, tried to pick me up in school, go malling, and watch a movie. Even his bands gigs I didn’t watched! I feel bad. But good at the same time. coz I was able to get away from the things I know I want but won’t do me any good.


Oh, have I mentioned that the guy looks like the vocalist of the band, Kjwan/MTV VJ? Yes! He looks like Marc Abaya… HOTNESS!


MAY 24, 2008

I slept around 3:15 in the morning. It’s not that I can’t sleep. I just choose not to sleep. I was just watching Raise Your Voice. I know, Hilary Duff.. haha! I love the songs in the movie + Johnny Lewis was there so I consider it as OK.


Then I woke up when my bro arrived around 6am. Was really pissed coz he had played his songs ng malakas. E, I was trying to sleep.. but after a couple of songs, he turned it off din. Then he slept sa kabilang room. I woke up almost 10am na. this time coz I heard my bro left naman. I still wanna sleep but I don’t want to have another headache sa sobrang tulog and my eyes won’t look good nanaman.


I don’t know if I’ll be glad coz I have the whole apartment all by myself. Or I’ll be sad coz well, for the 5 straight days, im alone, again. Usually, during Saturdays I do the laundry while talking to my friends on-line. But since my internet provider is still busy being a bad provider, you can scratch the whole internet thing from the list. So, you might think im doin the laundry while writing this. NO, im not. Im just doin this and soundtrippin. Blasting the music for the my neighbors to hear. Haha!


I was planning to go out. Buy a dvd, mail something to a friend and buy something I could eat while watching movies. Or maybe spend the whole afternoon with a friend of mine. Or visit this place my friends suggested but im still not ready to go coz Im not familiar with the route [mahirap ng mawala] and I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to travel alone especially that I don’t know anything bout the place. So, that’s a no. Drink, maybe? Nah… that was me a couple of days ago. I wanna be my sober self again.


anyway, good thing my bro cooked something for me. His way of saying sorry for waking me up with his music. At least now, I won’t worry bout my lunch.


Ain’t the 1st time that im home alone. Ain’t the 1st Saturday that im home alone, too. Ain’t the 1st time that I woke up and no ones home. Ain’t the 1st time that I woke up knowing that no one’s home, too.


I should really get used to this kind of life. I enjoy being alone but im not saying I don’t want someone to be with me. I do. I just think that it’s easier this way. If you don’t think so, then your welcome to enlighten me.

1 year and counting...

---wrote this one last May 21, 2008, too.



My anniversary! Yep! ..i’ve been living here in Cebu for a year now. that also means that I haven’t gone home for a year, too. Anyway, I’ve lived in Tagbilaran City, Bohol and General Santos also but I never really thought that I’ll be able to stay here in Cebu for this long. It’s not that I have something against the place. I just never pictured myself. But hey! im ok here. I love my school and met some really nice friends. Downfall lang is the nearest beach is like 45 mins away. And im not talking bout a really nice one. Just a beach beach. Not like in Bohol, white sand, peaceful atmosphere, really nice and accommodating people.. a place where I could just relax and bum around in between classes.


Anyway, I haven’t really explored Cebu so this coming months, im gonna try my best to go around the city and neighboring cities/provinces. So if you know a place I could visit, let me know. I don’t care if it’s far or expensive or so cheap. I don’t care if it’s public or exclusive. Beaches… historical spots… plazas… as long as you think it’s worth seeing. Tell me, ok? Im not maarte. All I wanna do now is explore the place im living in..


So, thanks in advance!

confessions...

this following blah blah im gonna post are like a few days old already. wasn't able to post it coz well, don't ask. haha! and uhmm.. whatever i wrote that day might not apply today or tomorrow anymore.
--


May 21, 2008

I have some confessions to make.


… I now only eat once a day. –seriously. My eating time is around 3-4pm.. then I go back to sleep or do some other things I can think of. Just trying my best not to burn down the apartment.


… been reading 2 books – THE ALEXANDRIA LINK by Steve Berry and KISSED THE GIRLS AND MADE THEM CRY by Lisa Bevere


… I don’t post lame “surveys” on Friendster anymore –congratulate me! I finally got over it.


… I don’t want to admit it but well, I miss talking to Steve Hass. –i guess this is what I get by listening to Cherry’s music, his former band. Anyway, I just hope the “CrazyHass” girls will stop bothering me


… most of my friends would say that im “kuripot”. That I would not spend much money even on things I really need. And if I could find something cheaper that’s what I would buy or if I could find a place that has cheap food, that’s where im gonna eat. Well, they’re wrong! At least that’s what I discovered. I SPLURGE!!! I received my 3rd pay last week and I still haven’t saved even a hundred!


… there’s a friend who asked me to forget about him. ---IM SORRY! But I can’t do that. I want to prove to you that im NOT just another “internet friend”. I may be busy with some other things but that doesn’t mean I don’t care anymore.


… I’m not sure if you’ve heard of Tila Tequila. She’s like the Madonna of Myspace.com. well, im not much a fan of hers but I was looking for new songs to download so I tried hers. Now, I can’t stop listening to her song, “Fuck Ya Man”! im having so much fun listening and singing it loud!


… i wanna play drums again! – I tried forgetting about it because of the memories it brings but what the heck! I just wanna do it again!


… im not much of a myspace whore anymore. Im missing it though. Haha! I met and made friends with some really nice and cool people there. Just like Steve, I miss talking to them.. Stephen Vanderpool, Mike Sylvia, Vesper, Kevin (meowmeow), Sammy (boldstar!).. and my hunnies ..Hunhun Sophie, Anne, Russ, Chevy, Jammy, January..


… I still procrastinate! You might think that since im not doing much these days then maybe I’ve accomplished a lot. Like clean my room, delete some people in my Myspace account, keep in touch with some friends, edit the photos my friends asked me to, blah blah… but, I haven’t! im just too lazy..


… im only on-line for like an hour or 2 these days. Thanks to my internet provider for not doing a very good job. Now im stuck in an internet café every night.

… I never really got serious of wanting to meet someone so bad. ..except for Kobe Bryant and Christina Aguilera, that is. But, there’s this one person who makes me want to get into a plane and just be with him 24/7! Im going crazy! Gggrrrrrrr……


… smoking is bad for your health. I know. but still, I SMOKE! this may come as a shocker for most of the people who knows me. ---Sorry.. Im just not the girl you used to know or should I say the girl you think I am. Close friends, relatives, don’t freak out! ..im not a chain smoker. I haven’t smoked for the past month now. Except for the 2 sticks I had a couple of nights ago.


… I DRINK! ..as if that’s new. Haha! I started drinking when I was 14. started with champagnes and wines [I even collected the bottles]. Then, the oh so famous Red Horse to Gilbey’s Gin.. to Tequila’s and Vodka’s.. I even tried Tanduay! Thanks to the BadBoys [ton-ton, Patrick, chelbert, and the other 2 guys ..forgot their name + RJ], i passed out. I swear im not gonna drink Tanduay again. My drinking habit stopped when I left Tagbilaran, Bohol a couple of years ago. Feels good being sober… anyway, that’s not my confession. Just felt like sharing it. What im trying to say here is I’ve been drinkin for the past couple of days.. been drinkin alone. Im not getting drunk or anything. Im just hella bored that I don’t wanna think of anything else. I know it’s stupid. I just wanna be stupid.


…everything I said here isn’t much of a big deal except maybe for the smoking and drinking part. I’ll be in total trouble if ever some of my family and relatives reads this. Then why did I posted this? Like what I’ve said, I wanna be stupid. What do I get for being stupid? I’ll let u know if I have the answer.

Friday, May 23, 2008

going GAGA over ....

CAM GIGANDET!!!!

... bad looking guy with a smile that makes me sooo weak! hahaha! seriously, he's just my type of guy. well, physically, i mean. i 1st saw him on THE OC series. but i never really paid any attention. but then, since im so bored back home, i started watching THE OC again and i fell in love on him all over again! ...the stare, the smile, the body.. ok. i should stop. i sound like a maniac already. hahaha!

..anyway, bout to put up some of his pics but well, stupid computer won't let me. grrr... so, i'll try to do it tomorrow.

really quick!

there's just a lot i wanna share now. i was actually excited to post my new entries but the computer im using now won't allow me to use USB. still have no internet connection in the apartment so i just write back home and transfer it whenever im here in the cafe. but well, postponed nanaman. grrr..

anyway..

this one is going to be quick..

.. DAVID COOK won! woohoo!!!
... i know this one is soooo old already but i haven't mentioned this in my previous blog and i was watching some videos bout him earlier. uhmm... KOBE BRYANT! hahaha! so glad that he has now an MVP award. :)
... i don't think i'll be going home this summer. i know. i know. i was excited but some things came up. bummer!
... i just realized that Brad Pitt is well, HOT. haha! i don't like him. i mean, he's not in my hot guys list. but while i was watching Interview with a Vampire last night that's when i realized it why most girls drool over him. saying this doesn't mean he's on my list now though. haha!
... CONGRATULATIONS Ronnel Flores and the rest of the guys for winning Dipolog's Pagsalabok Festivals' street dancing and best in choreography award. naks!!! :)
... pregnantville... hahaha! 2 of the closest girls in my life are well, pregnant.. :)

Friday, May 16, 2008

NO internet!!!!

it's been a week! arrrggghhh!!! i don't know what's up. internet back in our apartment is still fucked up! grrr..

well, at first it's like a good thing since it's finals week. i can concentrate more and finish my school work right away. but, i remembered, i had to tutor everynight and of course, HIM.

so i had to go to an internet cafe everynight and wait for my brother to pick me up. HASSLE!

i saw this south park video, a scene where they had no internet. they were all freaking out! i think it was retarded. REALLY RETARDED! like they're gonna die if there's no internet. haha!

oh well, now i think im retarded! hahah! because i feel like im dying lil by lil. i NEED INTERNET!!! seriously.. im an internet freak. its not like i don't have a life. its just that most of my friends are not here in Cebu. and i hardly but load for my cellphone so i depend on the internet to get in touch with them.

that explains why i haven't been posting much here. anyway, summer class just ended today, i might have more time since there's no more research thing i should finish.


and uhmmm... globelines! bring my internet back!

Sunday, May 11, 2008

miss na jd tka!

i've been trying to write something here for the last 30 minutes.. but when i start on the second line, i erase everything right away...

guess all i want to say is...


I MISS YOU TERRIBLY!!!

Friday, May 9, 2008

1 more week!!!

.. and it's friday! i should be rejoicing, i know. no class.. but im not. 1 more week left, 1 more week of struggling to understand what my teacher's teaching us, 1 more week of hell.. well, not really. just in my ReEd 30 class which ironically is about God.

anyway, i still have 4 journals left to read [i finished one already, thank GOD!] + write a review on the 5 journals that was assigned to us + 1 more chapter on Social Psych to study on (that's if we can't finished it right away. if we do, that means an additional chapter) + at least 3 more sacraments for my ReEd 30 + STUDY fOR MY FINALS = TOTAL WRECK! all of those in just 1 week. not to mention i have to stay in school for 5 hours then another 1 hour for tutorial. i know it seems lil but there's just a lot to read! ..don't get me wrong, i love to read but all of those in 1 week?! arrghhh!!!

the thing that keeps me going though is the fact that i'll be going home after my finals! :) oohhh.... i can't wait! hahaha! ...it's not 100% yet but there's a high chances that i would. :)

a lot of things is bothering me now but im glad i still have reasons to smile.

can't wait to travel alone again!!!

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HIM .. just HIM!

most of the time, i push people away. not because i don't want them in my life but because im just making sure that they would stick by me no matter what. im INSECURE! and i have grown to believe that people always leave.

all i want is for him to STAY.

i know i shouldn't think or act that way. coz what if one day that person will realize that he's already tired? or what if he'll find someone else?

lately, my life's been full of "i-don't-knows" ..maybe i do know, but im just being such a denial queen. right now, there are a couple of things i wanna share to anyone reading this...

1. i like someone
2. i LOVE that someone
3. i just wanna be with him
4. that someone ..i don't wanna lose
5. u may say that im STUPID, but i don't care anymore

why? why him? again, I DO NOT KNOW! u may say i just got attracted to him coz he always makes me smile, coz he's always there.. maybe you are right. it's just mere attraction.. but why do i feel like IT's him? am i being bias? why do i feel so sad whenever we don't get to talk? why do i feel so giddy whenever he calls? ..coz he's giving me attention? i don't think so.. there's a lot of guys here who wants to hang-out with me [not that im bragging] but i turned them all down.

gawd! he got me soooo bad! that im starting not to care what other people are saying. im starting to ignore whatever negative trait he has..

i should know, right? im a psychology major... but believe me... i don't

---

you're not talking to me right now. you said i crossed the line.. :(
IM SORRY!
you know i don't really mean it..

Thursday, May 8, 2008

... DAVID COOK [he SHOULD WIN!]

i don't really watch American Idol. i think the only season na talagang pinanuod ko is, where Fantasia Barino won. and uhmm.. yung time nila bo bice and katherine mcphee.. im not addicted to it. i just love watching them perform and re-arranging the songs plus, Jasmine and Camille was there who are half pinays.. syempre, support din! ;)

anyway, season 7 is all around! ..at least that's what i get to hear and see. the 2 davids, jason, syesha, and brooke.. plus another pinay [Ramiele] who got booted off early in the show. She's really good! i like her better than Jasmine Trias. and the bloopers of Paula Abdul is all over yahoo..

someone i know told me to watch it. because of Ramiele.. i never did. though i checked out some of her performances on youtube.com. then a month later, i heard a new version of MC's "always be my baby". turns out it was a song performed by David Cook during their 6th week.

i loved it right away! his voice, the arrangement, the way he sang it... grrr... for me its a better version than MC's. haha!

last night i heard him sing Hungry Like the Wolf by Duran Duran and Baba O'Riley by The Who. im not familiar with the songs but i am familiar with the artisits. I don't know which version is better but one thing i know is that, HE SHOULD WIN! haha!

its down to 3. him, David Archuleta and Syesha Mercado. all of them are great! lil David is simply amazing! and so is Syesha though i find her so "arte". she reminds me of Rihanna by the way. the face i mean. not the voice.

nextweek, it's gonna be the contestant, judges and producer's choice. i wonder what David Cook will sing... finale's on May 20. im not even sure if i'll be able to see it.

GO DAVID COOK!!! :D

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

moments....

im happy! :)

..i just got home and its 3am already. i was out with my brother and his gf and my uncle who is more like our cousin coz he's young. he [my uncle] arrived the other day and we were supposed to have dinner together but he was busy. i was so excited to see him coz its been a year since we last hanged out and i truly miss his company. he's years older than me but i always feel comfortable with him.

so we rescheduled our dinner date and ate Salams and Chicken Garlic Supreme for dinner at Da Vinci's Pizza just a couple of hours ago..

it feels so good to have a relative around. talking about childhood memories, catching up with all the things that we missed about each other. plus the fact that im included on the "adult" conversation already. im not considered as the kid anymore.. woohoo! that's 1 step. haha! :) anyway, that just shows how much i miss home.

after the late dinner, we just hanged-out outside and ate Ruffles over a cup of tea and my Frap Crumble. plus more talks and camwhore moments! the pics i'll post soon..

anyway... im supposed to be sleeping now since i still have a 10:30 class later and i have to be up by 8am coz i still haven't finished our groups paper work. that means 5 hours of sleep. eek! i really need to teach myself on how to hate eyebags.. haha! oh well... nytynyt!!!

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

TRAVIS pt.2

i know it's still your day but it's already 30 here now. so just another itsy bitsy thing for you before i go to sleep.. here's a song i stumbled upon yesterday.

you always say how much you want to make me smile..

listen...


Don't need the sun to shine, To make me smile,
Don't care if it's dark outside,
Cos I got you,
And though the rain may fall,
No I won't care at all,
Cos baby,
I know that I got you.


uhmm.. the other 2 doesn't exist. there's only 1 and YOU know who he is.
oh, and don't give me such a hard time na coz it's not your birthday anymore. haha!

TRAVIS....

ooohhh... a post dedicated to you! now you might think you're special.. hah! uhmmm... it's still 28 there but it's 29 here already. so, since it's you're day, well ok... you're special! haha!!! jk. birthday or not YOU ARE SSSSSPPPPPEEEEAAAAACCCCIIIIIIIAAAAALLLLLLLL!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!

i don't have any present or anything but i hope you appreciate the little things i do. though i don't really do much. haha!

im thinking of posting your photos here. but i changed my mind. someone else might discover you. haha! but, here's one...


xoxo


anyway, i'm late for class.. you're not ol so im sending my greetings through my blog.

Na nn nu rul hwang sang saeng gak hae.
Na wa ham gge it ul re!


im not really sure if that's right. Jin Soo just taught me that last night. :) So, im learning Korean now. haha! Now you have to learn Tagalog, Bisaya and a bit of Spanish and Korean. :p


lotsa lots of aggie love!

...ttyl!

Monday, April 28, 2008

ganun pa rin

I AM JUST AS STUPID AS EVER!




..complicated
..unsure
..uncertain

..and i'm as blurry as this photo can get!


Wednesday, April 23, 2008

adik sayo!

i never really admitted that im a jealous person. well, i believe im not.

ok, allow me to clear it. yes, i DO get jealous BUT.. BUT if im so much into someone, yes. even though i like someone, i don't get jealous easily. so there's a hint. if i get jealous, it means, you got me. you got me so bad!

it was one of the very rare times that i admitted that im jealous. grrrr!!! i hated admitting it! makes me so weak! pero, parang na trap na ako so i just said it. keeping what you feel isn't nice and it just adds to confusion. so, here i am again, letting it all out. well, not all, i guess. haha!

uhmmm.. i asked him to wait. he did. i feel bad every time i ask him to but it feels good seeing him on-line. and knowing that he really waited for you for how many hours. i was able to talk to him a couple of hours ago and it gives me this feeling na para bang "i can do everything!" or like, "im happy! nothing can ruin my day."

some might say im being delusional. that im stupid. SO? i know anong pinasukan ko. this isn't the 1st time. i learned my lesson kay mikz [special mention ka pa, LOKO KA! haha!]. pero, seryoso.. maybe its an i-knew-it-all-along or overconfidence phenomenon. whatever it is, im willing to go all over it again.

he's still idle. been idle for almost 3 hours now. [WHAT ARE YOU DOING?] ...you know i can't wait as long as you do. even if i want to, that means me, sleeping in class the next day. i know you don't want that. haha!

so, before i go to sleep and dream bout the future, uhmmm... here's something for my pet whore/it's complicated on fb/foofie/bf/ ...what's next? haha! seriously, i was about to exit my playlist when i realized what the song is all about. listen to it and ttyl. =)